10 Reasons Why EMDR Trauma Therapy Doesn't Work

a closeup of the torso of a woman in a plaid blaser with her hands raised and the shoulder and hands of a woman in a green sweatshirt representing great emdr therapy san francisco

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a hot treatment right now. Many people, including celebrities, have cited it as a game-changer for their mental health. The research backs this up; EMDR is a potent therapeutic approach for processing trauma and treating PTSD. But like any therapy, its effectiveness can vary from person to person. If you've tried EMDR therapy without experiencing the expected results, you're not alone. Let's explore ten reasons why EMDR may not work as expected.

1. You Weren't Properly Triggered For EMDR

EMDR's success hinges on fully accessing traumatic memories. That means you'll likely feel uncomfortable. It’s your therapist’s job to make sure this happens. If you're not triggered during EMDR therapy sessions, memory processing may not occur. Triggering for EMDR is tricky because we have built-in natural defenses against getting triggered. Sometimes your therapist needs to get creative in helping you access upsetting memories. If you're not feeling as upset as you think you could be during EMDR, tell your therapist right away.

Example of Poor Triggering in EMDR

Sarah had been struggling with anxiety and intrusive memories related to a traumatic event from her childhood. She decided to give EMDR therapy a try, hoping it would help her find some relief. During her sessions, the memories she was focusing on didn't feel upsetting like they were at other times. When she thought about it outside therapy, she was still upset. She felt disconnected from the process and wondered if EMDR was the right choice for her. Eventually she gave on up EMDR because nothing was changing.

Alexis Bibler, AMFT

Alexis is a fully trained EMDR therapist. She works online with clients in California.

Laurel Roberts-Meese, LMFT

Laurel is a fully trained EMDR therapist. She works online with clients in California, Florida, and Pennsylvania.

2. Your Therapist Doesn't Have Proper Training in EMDR

EMDR might seem simple from the outside. There's a series of questions and some bilateral stimulation. But it's much more complicated than that. True EMDR requires extensive training and ongoing consultation. If your therapist lacks the necessary training and expertise, EMDR is unlikely to work. Clients should always ensure that their therapist holds the appropriate qualifications. At minimum, your therapist should have completed 50 hours of training through an EMDRIA approved program. Ideally they participate in ongoing consultation with EMDR practitioners. Formal certification by EMDRIA is not necessary for a therapist to provide excellent EMDR. Certification is costly and time-consuming and does not guarantee better results.

The Impact Of Poor Therapist Training in EMDR

Mark had been searching for a therapist to help him process his trauma. He found a therapist, but his sessions lacked structure. His therapist seemed unsure about the procedures. This left Mark questioning whether he should continue EMDR. He decided to try a different EMDR therapist and it was like night and day.

A Note About Self-EMDR and EMDR Apps

If you see an app or website promoting self-EMDR, don't try to process upsetting memories on your own. Apps and sites that offer bilateral audio and visuals can be great tools for relaxation while thinking about positive memories. But that's where the benefits end. True processing requires a skilled professional.

3. Lack of Resourcing and Self-Soothing Preparation For EMDR Therapy

We're surprised how often we hear about negative EMDR experiences due to lack of preparation. We've heard about too many EMDR therapists who went right into processing trauma without building resources and coping tools. Be sure your therapist doesn’t skip this step.

a woman in a pink sweater holds her hand over her heart representing compassionate and effective online emdr  and emdr therapy san francisco

The Importance of Resourcing For EMDR Therapy

The emotional activation of EMDR therapy can be intense. Without good resourcing and self-soothing techniques, you may get flooded and shut down. EMDR is often uncomfortable, but you need to be able to engage in the process. If you're outside your ability to cope, you can't engage. It's understandable to find it challenging to manage the distress that can arise during EMDR sessions. Your therapist should help you work toward being able to handle the intensity if it's hard for you.

What Does Resourcing Look Like In EMDR Therapy?

Resourcing is a highly personalized process. For some it takes a single session. For others it takes weeks or months of therapy. There's no correct amount of time, other than the time it takes to give you the resources you need.

For some people, connecting with positive memories is helpful. For others, it's imagining nurturing and protective family or friends with them. For others, it’s breathing exercises and affirmations. For others, it's connecting with the feeling they get in their body when they're doing something they love. A skilled EMDR therapist should provide personalized resourcing before processing traumatic memories.

The Impact of Poor Resourcing and Self-Soothing For EMDR Therapy

Alex had heard about the effectiveness of EMDR for trauma processing from his room mate. He decided to give it a try. But during EMDR sessions, Alex found it impossible manage the intense emotions that arose. He often felt upset for hours after his sessions, and sometimes the next few days. He felt confused and alone. His EMDR therapist kept going and didn't make any changes. Alex felt overwhelmed and doubting whether he could continue with the therapy. Ultimately, he stopped going because he didn't want to feel so upset anymore.

4. Your EMDR Therapist Picked The Wrong Memory To Target in EMDR Therapy

Trauma is weird. Sometimes the thing that's actually upsetting us is hidden deep in our past. It might not feel directly related to the thing we think we're upset about. But our brains are complex webs of memories. Sometimes things get tied together in a way we don't yet understand.

EMDR Therapy Floatback Memories

EMDR often involves finding a "floatback" memory as a starting point for memory processing. This means finding the earliest memory that's related to the thing you came in for. You don't have to do this yourself. Your EMDR therapist has a specific line of questions to help you identify your floatback. But if your EMDR therapist does not identify the right memory, EMDR may not work. It's critical to address the root causes of distress. Engaging in open dialogue with your therapist can help pinpoint the right memory to target during sessions.

Please know it's not your job to find the right memory to target during EMDR. That's part of the 50-hour training your EMDR therapist did to be qualified to practice EMDR. But if you suspect you don't have the right target, speak up.

Example of Incorrect EMDR Targeting

Emily had experienced several traumatic events in her life and sought EMDR therapy to address the emotional pain she carried. During her sessions, Emily felt stuck. She never felt better about the memory they were trying to process. In a conversation with a friend, she realized that her EMDR therapist had not helped her identify the right "floatback" memory. That's why she felt frustrated and unsure about the therapy's effectiveness. She told her EMDR therapist, who helped identify the right memory. Emily felt the difference soon afterward. Now, she's processed the whole chain of events and feels better than ever.

5. Your EMDR Therapist Isn’t Using The Right Kind Of Bilateral Stimulation For EMDR Therapy

a woman with black curly hair against a blue background wearing white headphones smiling with her eyes closed representing someone who has healed trauma through online EMDR therapy in california

The core of EMDR's effectiveness lies in bilateral stimulation. That means side-to-side sensation, and we call it BLS for short. BLS can involve eye movements, tactile sensations, or auditory cues. None are better than others, but some people respond better to certain kinds of BLS. The choice of the wrong style of BLS for your needs can impede progress. If you know you're a very visual person, you might need visual BLS. If you like a hands-on approach, you might want tactile BLS. Work collaboratively with your EMDR therapist to find the most effective BLS approach for you.

Read more about different types of bilateral stimulation.

Example of Poor BLS Choice In EMDR Therapy

David was eager to try EMDR therapy to address his PTSD symptoms. During his sessions, he found the eye movements to be uncomfortable. He had headaches after every session, which made him dread them. He also didn't think EMDR was effective. His EMDR therapist hadn't explored alternative bilateral stimulation methods with him. David asked if there were any other ways to do EMDR, and his EMDR therapist suggested tapping. David thought it sounded weird, but gave it a try. Right away he noticed a difference. He was able to fully engage in trauma therapy and experienced great results.

6. You're Dissociating During EMDR Therapy

Dissociation is a normal coping mechanism. It's quite adaptive, actually. Dissociation happens when you disconnect from your thoughts, feelings, and memories to protect yourself from feeling overwhelmed. When asked to revisit your most upsetting memories, it makes sense that some people would check out. But it can pose a significant challenge during EMDR therapy. Remember, EMDR only works if you can fully access a memory or feeling state. Some people may dissociate during EMDR sessions, detaching from the traumatic memories rather than processing them. If you feel like you're not "there" during EMDR therapy, speak up. Good EMDR therapists should help you figure out how to stay present during therapy.

Example of Dissociating During EMDR Therapy

Lisa started EMDR therapy with high hopes. But during her sessions, she often felt like she wasn't fully there. She felt checked out from her body and feelings. After a few weeks, she told her EMDR therapist she felt disconnected from the traumatic memories instead of processing them. They paused trauma processing and worked on tools to help Lisa stay present during therapy. After a few months, she was able to fully engage in EMDR. She also noticed she was able to tolerate other parts of her life without checking out too. It was a win-win-win.

7. You Have Unresolved Complex Trauma

EMDR is often mistakenly talked about as a quick fix. And it can be a quick fix for simple things. But it might not help with complex trauma if the therapy does not address all the underlying issues. Complex trauma involves a detailed web of interconnected experiences and emotions that require a highly skilled therapist.

What is Complex Trauma?

Complex trauma most often shows up in our relationships. Prolonged exposure to danger, compounding losses, or severe abuse and suffering can create complicated webs of memories. EMDR isn't going to work in a short timeframe for complex trauma. It can help, but true healing of complex trauma can take years.

If you have complex trauma and want to try EMDR, be sure to carefully select your therapist. EMDR therapists working with complex trauma should have extensive experience in treating complex trauma.

Complex Trauma Complications in EMDR Therapy

Michael had experienced many traumatic events throughout his childhood and adult life, resulting in a complex web of emotional pain and distress. He decided to explore EMDR therapy to work through these experiences. However, as therapy progressed, he realized that his EMDR therapist was primarily focusing on individual traumatic incidents. Everything felt connected, and he didn't understand why they were separating some memories out and not others. His trauma felt like a neverending maze and no one had a map. Michael began to doubt whether EMDR could address his complex trauma.

8. Lack of Trust and Rapport With Your EMDR Therapist

Your EMDR therapist's training isn't the only thing that matters. Research shows that 80% of the effectiveness of therapy is based on how well you click with your therapist. Establishing trust and rapport with your EMDR therapist is essential for the success of EMDR therapy. If you don't feel comfortable with your EMDR therapist, EMDR won't be as effective. You should feel a solid partnership for healing to occur. It's fine to switch EMDR therapists based on a weird vibe or feeling like it's not a good match.

What Happens When You Don't Trust Your Trauma Therapist

Jessica was eager to start EMDR therapy to process a sexual assault she experienced a few years ago. But she found it challenging to open up to her EMDR therapist. She felt uncomfortable discussing her real emotions. Even though she knew it was confidential, she couldn't get comfortable. She stopped going and decided to tough it out herself. But when she met someone wonderful she wanted to date, she realized her sexual trauma was impacting her relationships. She found a different EMDR therapist and decided to try a few sessions. It was an instant difference. Her new EMDR therapist was warm and personable and Jessica felt understood and cared for. They processed her sexual assault and Jessica felt a lot better.

a closeup of a woman holding an hourglass representing the importance of time and patience with emdr therapy san francisco

9. Unrealistic Expectations of EMDR Therapy

Like many forms of psychotherapy, EMDR may take time to feel results. Some clients may start therapy expecting immediate and dramatic changes. But healing sometimes occurs gradually. This can be frustrating. When we're suffering, we want to feel better as soon as possible. But patience and perseverance are key in the journey of EMDR therapy. Healing often unfolds in stages, and consistent effort over time can lead to profound transformations.

The Impact of Unrealistic Expectations for EMDR Therapy

Ryan started his EMDR journey with high hopes of quick and dramatic results. As sessions progressed, he realized that healing was going slower than he anticipated. He thought it was supposed to be a quick fix, just a few sessions. Disheartened by the slow progress, Ryan began to question whether EMDR was effective for him. He asked his EMDR therapist how much longer EMDR would take. His EMDR therapist explained that his particular trauma takes more time to process. Unsatisfied with that answer, Ryan stopped therapy and went back to white-knuckling it through life.

a woman blowing hair out of her face representing the importance of belief in online emdr and emdr therapy san francsico

10. You Don't Think EMDR Therapy Will Work

Trauma therapy doesn't work if you're not fully engaged in the process. If you think something is a waste of time, it will be. We're not requiring blind trust and devotion to a new type of therapy. Mild skepticism and curiousity is fine and healthy. But if you're an EMDR cynic, it has little potential to bring about healing.

We know this sounds weird. But recent literature shows that even with medical and surgical procedures, the patient's belief that the treatment will help accounts for a huge amount of the effectiveness. It's more complex than a simple placebo effect. The treatment DOES work. But it works a lot better when you think it will. A willing and open mindset allows clients to fully explore their traumatic experiences. EMDR can only be as effective as the client's willingness to participate in the process.

The Impact of Skepticism on EMDR Therapy

Sandra had heard about EMDR therapy from a friend who had experienced remarkable results. Intrigued by the potential for healing, she decided to give it a try to address her past trauma. However, as she began her EMDR sessions, doubts and skepticism crept in. She found it challenging to engage in the process and struggled to believe that it could help her. Her EMDR therapist noticed her reservations and encouraged open communication. It became clear that Sandra's lack of belief in EMDR therapy was impeding her progress. Through ongoing discussions and support, they worked together to address her doubts and develop a more positive outlook on EMDR. As her belief in the therapy's potential grew, Sandra's engagement deepened. She began to experience the healing benefits EMDR had to offer.

EMDR As An Effective Trauma Therapy

While EMDR has been transformative for many people, its effectiveness can vary for a lot of reasons. If you were disappointed with EMDR therapy, don’t lose hope. Open and honest discussions with your therapist about your concerns are invaluable. Together, you can explore roadblocks, learn tools, adapt EMDR to your needs, and implement strategies to overcome these challenges.

Remember that the journey of healing and recovery is individualized. Progress can often be nonlinear. With patience, flexibility, and the unwavering support of a qualified therapist, EMDR can still be a valuable and effective tool in your path to healing.

EMDR Therapists In Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Throughout California and Florida

If you’re looking for an EMDR therapist, we are happy to offer EMDR therapy in Los Angeles, as well as throughout California and Florida. Our convenient teletherapy services are just as effective as in-person: multiple EMDRIA-funded studies have proven this. If you want to start working toward processing your trauma and living life free from its grasp, book a free consultation.

Previous
Previous

Navigating Virtual Codependency: Balancing Online and Offline Love

Next
Next

Choosing the Right Approach: Gottman Method Couples Therapy, EFT, and Imago Therapy