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Ontological Loss: When You Lose the Life You Thought You Would Have
When a life path disappears — through diagnosis, infertility, divorce, or a derailed dream — the grief is real even when no one has died. A therapist explains ontological loss.
Why EMDR Therapy Works Even If You Cannot Remember Everything That Happened
One of the most common things people say when they're considering EMDR therapy is some version of: I'm not sure this will work for me because I can't really remember what happened.
The memory is hazy. Or partial. Or there's no narrative at all, just a feeling, a physical response, a vague sense that something is wrong without a clear story attached to it.
That concern makes sense. It's also based on a misunderstanding of how EMDR works, and more broadly, of how trauma is stored.
EMDR and Grief: How Trauma Therapy Can Help When Loss Feels Stuck
Grief is not a pathology. It does not follow a schedule. It does not resolve on anyone else's timeline.
Some days it feels manageable. Other days a smell, a photograph, or a song pulls everything back. That is normal. That is what grief does.
What is less normal is when grief gets stuck.
The Difference Between Feeling Calm, Numb, and Dissociated in EMDR Therapy
Clients often tell their EMDR therapist, “I felt calm during that set,” only to realize later that they were actually numb or starting to dissociate. These states can feel similar in the moment, but they affect trauma therapy very differently. Understanding the distinction helps you communicate with your EMDR therapist, stay grounded in session, and get the most benefit from EMDR therapy.
How Much Detail Do I Need to Share During EMDR Therapy?
Do you have to spill every secret and relive every moment? Or is there room for keeping some things private? Let’s break down what's actually helpful when it comes to sharing your trauma in therapy.
What Makes An "EMDR Super-Processor"? The Variables Behind Rapid EMDR Therapy Success
EMDR therapy is quickly gaining traction as a primary trauma therapy treatment, and for good reason. Studies have shown that EMDR has an 85% success rate for reducing trauma symptoms. As a team, we've collectively been providing EMDR therapy for over a decade, and with great results. We've seen our fair share of "super processors," or people who respond very quickly to EMDR therapy. Here are the variables we've noted.
Seriously, What's With the Eye Movements? A Simple Explainer on EMDR Therapy
EMDR therapy sounds weird. Eye movements? Tapping? For trauma? Here's an honest, jargon-free explanation of what actually happens in EMDR and why it works.
When Trauma Is Mostly Resolved But Something Still Feels Off
Feel mostly healed but still getting triggered? Learn why residual trauma lingers and how EMDR therapy can help you close the last loop.
I Can’t Stop Thinking About Something That Happened. Can EMDR Therapy Help Me?
If you can't stop thinking about something that happened, you are not weak or dramatic. You may have an unprocessed memory, and EMDR therapy can often help.
Rejection Sensitivity vs. Trauma Triggers: How to Tell the Difference (and Why It Matters for Treatment)
Rejection sensitivity is an intense, often rapid emotional response to perceived rejection, criticism, or disapproval. It is frequently cognitive and relational in origin, rooted in attachment patterns, perfectionism, or ADHD.
Why Your In-Laws Trigger You So Much (And How EMDR Can Help)
If you find yourself wondering, "Why do my in-laws trigger me so much?" the answer is usually deeper than “they’re annoying.”
Yes, maybe they are intrusive and critical and always seem to know exactly how to get under your skin. But when a reaction feels intense, immediate, or hard to shake, it usually means something in your nervous system is getting activated.
Does EMDR Therapy Work Online? What The Research Says
When EMDR therapy first became widely available online, many people had the same reaction:
Wait… this works over video?
EMDR therapy already feels a little unusual if you’re new to it. You think about a difficult memory while following eye movements or tapping your shoulders, and somehow the memory becomes less distressing.
How To Find a Great EMDR Therapist in San Francisco
If you’re searching for trauma therapy in the Bay Area, you’ve probably come across EMDR therapy.
Short for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, EMDR is a highly researched and effective treatment for trauma, PTSD, and emotional activation, among other things.
But like any therapy, your experience depends largely on finding the right fit.
EMDR Therapy for Fear of Flying: How It Works and Why It Helps
Fear of flying is super common. It’s not just about turbulence or claustrophobia. For many people, the anxiety tied to flying can feel overwhelming, even debilitating. It can affect your ability to travel for work, see loved ones, or take vacations. Even the thought of booking a flight might cause panic, sleeplessness, or intrusive thoughts.
Can EMDR Make Symptoms Worse Before They Improve?
Trauma processing, temporary distress, and how to know when EMDR therapy is working safely. One of the most understandable concerns people have before starting trauma therapy is this: can EMDR make symptoms worse?
How Long Does EMDR Take to Work? Timeline & What to Expect
One of the most common questions clients ask in our free phone consultations is how long EMDR therapy will take. It's an understandable concern; people want relief, and they want to know what they are committing to emotionally, financially, and timewise.
Reflections on the LA Marathon from a Trauma Therapist
The taiko drums start before 7am, though it feels more like 6am thanks to Daylight Savings. Soon after the drums, amplified music kicks in. Then come the news helicopters.
Living one block off the LA Marathon race route, I look forward to it every year.
And every year, I’m overwhelmed by the emotional beauty and complexity of watching the LA Marathon experience.
How EMDR Therapy Can Prevent PTSD (Rather Than Treat It)
Something happened. Maybe it was a car accident. A medical emergency. A sudden breakup. A traumatic birth. A natural disaster.
You keep thinking about it.
Your body feels jumpy. You’re not sleeping well. You replay certain moments. Loud sounds feel louder. Your nervous system feels… off.
And you might be wondering: Do I just wait this out? Or is there something I can do now?
There is.
EMDR therapy, when used early and strategically, can help prevent acute stress from becoming long-term PTSD.
Does EMDR Therapy Work for Everyone?
EMDR therapy is often described as transformative. And for many people, it is. It’s gained a solid reputation for helping with trauma, anxiety, and distressing memories. But you might be wondering: Does EMDR therapy work for everyone?
EMDR Therapy for Trauma: Why the Body Holds More Than the Mind
You understand what happened. You can tell the story clearly. You know it was not your fault. You’ve read the books. You’ve done the insight work.
And yet.
You still have reactions that don’t fit the situation you’re in. Logically, you know you are safe. Your body does not.
This is one of the most confusing parts of trauma: the mind can move forward while the body remains vigilant. And this is why EMDR therapy can be so powerful.
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We offer individualized teletherapy for a wide range of mental health and relational issues. Our San Francisco & Los Angeles therapists can help with anxiety, trauma therapy, EMDR therapy, LGBT gay and lesbian therapy issues, holistic therapy, enneagram therapy, therapy for lawyers, couples therapy, therapy for burnout, and therapy for teenagers. We serve many people in San Francisco, Santa Cruz, and Los Angeles, as well as throughout California and Florida. Our team is anti-racist, body positive, LGBT and trans affirming and sex positive. You deserve to feel good!