Seriously, What's With the Eye Movements? A Simple Explainer on EMDR Therapy
So someone told you about EMDR therapy and you immediately had questions.
Like: eye movements? For trauma? Are you serious?
Valid. It sounds like something someone made up and is trying to sell you on Instagram. And yet EMDR is one of the most well-researched trauma treatments in existence, recommended by the World Health Organization, the VA, and pretty much every major mental health body that has looked at the evidence.
Here's the thing: the eye movements are real, they matter, and there's actually a solid explanation for why they work. But they're also not the whole story, and you don't even need to use eye movements for EMDR to be effective.
Let's break this down in a way that doesn't require a neuroscience degree. If you want the deep-dive clinical version, our EMDR therapy page has that. This is the human version.
Daniella Mohazab, AMFT
Daniella is an EMDR therapist who works with adults navigating trauma, anxiety, and the kind of pain that's been sitting around longer than it should have. She has a knack for explaining EMDR in a way that makes sense to people who walked in skeptical. She sees clients online throughout California.
Alexis Harney, LMFT
Alexis is a fully trained EMDR therapist who works with adults processing trauma, anxiety, and long-standing patterns that haven't shifted with other approaches. She brings a calm, grounded presence to the work and spends real time on preparation so clients feel ready before processing begins. She sees clients online throughout California and Florida.
Okay, What Even Is EMDR?
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. Which is a mouthful, and honestly a bit of an confusing and misleading name for something that has helped millions of people heal from trauma.
The core idea is this: when something traumatic happens, your brain doesn't always file it away properly. Instead of becoming a regular memory, it gets stored in a kind of fragmented, unfinished state. The emotions, body sensations, and negative beliefs attached to that experience stay raw and active because your brain thinks you need them always available to stay safe.
This is why trauma can be so triggering years or even decades after it’s over.
EMDR therapy helps your brain go back and finish processing those stuck experiences. It does this using bilateral stimulation, a back-and-forth sensory input that engages both sides of the brain while you hold a traumatic memory in mind.
The most famous form of bilateral stimulation is eye movements. But more on that in a second.
But Why Eye Movements?
This is the part that makes everyone raise an eyebrow. It sounds anti-science; move your eyes and your trauma goes away? Sure, Jan.
Here's the best explanation we have.
During EMDR therapy, you follow a moving stimulus (often a therapist's finger, a light bar, or a moving object on a screen) back and forth with your eyes while simultaneously holding a traumatic memory in mind. This bilateral, rhythmic eye movement appears to do something interesting to how the brain processes the memory.
We know it definitely works. Science is clear on that. Science is less clear on why. The leading theory is that it mimics what happens during REM sleep.
During REM sleep, your eyes move rapidly back and forth while your brain consolidates and processes the day's experiences. Many researchers believe that bilateral eye movements during EMDR activate a similar mechanism: the brain loosens its grip on the emotional intensity of a memory, allowing it to be reprocessed and stored differently.
Think of it like this: the memory doesn't disappear. What changes is the charge attached to it. A traumatic memory that used to feel immediate and threatening starts to feel more like something that happened, past tense, rather than something that's still happening now.
That shift is the whole point.
So If Eye Movements Are So Important, Why Is It Not Always Eye Movements?
Tatevik Sarkisian, AMFT
Tatevik works with adults and teens on trauma, anxiety, and burnout using EMDR and other trauma-informed approaches. She's particularly thoughtful about adapting bilateral stimulation for online sessions, making the work feel approachable even for clients who aren't sure what to expect. She sees clients online throughout California.
Eye movements are the most studied form of bilateral stimulation, but they're far from the only option. EMDR therapy can be done using:
Auditory tones — alternating sounds in each ear through headphones
Tactile tapping — a therapist tapping alternately on your hands or knees
Self-tapping — you tap your own knees or cross your arms and tap your shoulders
Handheld buzzers — small devices controlled by your therapist that vibrate alternately in each hand
In online EMDR therapy, which is how we work with our clients, therapists get creative. Tapping and auditory stimulation both translate well to telehealth. Some clients actually prefer the tapping because it feels more grounding. Non-visual forms of bilateral stimulation have fewer side effects like headaches and eye strain. We also have the ability to control tones or handheld buzzers remotely.
The bilateral element is what matters. The type of stimulation is flexible. Your EMDR therapist will help you figure out what works best for your nervous system.
"I Thought It Would Feel Weird. It Did. And Then It Worked."
Mia* was 27 and had been in traditional talk therapy for three years. She understood her anxiety. She could trace it back to her childhood. She could explain it clearly to anyone who asked. And she still woke up most mornings with a tight chest and a vague sense of dread she couldn't shake.
Her therapist suggested EMDR. Mia's first reaction was skepticism. Her therapist explained the process patiently, and they spent two full sessions on preparation before touching any memories.
When they started processing, Mia used alternating tapping on her knees instead of eye movements. She held the image of a specific childhood memory in mind. Her therapist guided sets of tapping while Mia followed whatever came up without trying to analyze it.
She described it afterward as: "Like watching a movie that used to make me panic and realizing it's just a movie."
The memory didn't disappear. But it stopped feeling like a live wire.
*Name and identifying details changed.
What Actually Happens In an EMDR Session
People often imagine EMDR as a therapist waving their hand in front of your face while you lie on a couch having flashbacks. It is not that.
EMDR therapy has eight structured phases, and a good chunk of those phases have nothing to do with trauma processing at all. Before you ever touch a difficult memory, your EMDR therapist should:
Learn your history and understand what you're working on
Help you build internal resources and grounding skills
Teach you how to stay regulated when things feel intense
Make sure you have what you need to feel safe enough to do the work
Only after that preparation does actual memory processing begin. And even then, the session isn't you reliving your trauma in full technicolor. You access the memory, but from a more distant vantage point. You notice what comes up. You follow the bilateral stimulation. Your therapist tracks what's happening and adjusts as needed.
Most people describe it as strange but not overwhelming. More like the memory becomes less sticky over repeated sets, until it stops snagging your nervous system the way it used to.
Does It Actually Work Though?
Yes. The research on EMDR is resoundingly strong. You can check it out at EMDRIA.org.
EMDR was originally developed to treat PTSD, and that evidence base is extensive. But EMDR therapy has also been shown to be effective for anxiety, phobias, performance enhancement, attachment wounds, chronic pain with trauma components, and a range of other issues that don't fit neatly into a PTSD diagnosis.
The key is that EMDR addresses disturbance at the stored memory level, not just at the level of thoughts and behaviors. This is part of why people often see meaningful change when talk therapy alone hasn't fully moved the needle.
Talk therapy is powerful. But it works primarily through language and insight. EMDR works through the nervous system.
It's also worth knowing that EMDR isn't a quick fix. Our post on how long EMDR takes to work goes into realistic timelines. The short version: some specific memories process relatively quickly once you're in active reprocessing, but building the foundation, processing fully, and integrating the changes takes time. For most people working on significant trauma, expect a minimum of 8 sessions before you have a clear sense of how it's going.
Not Just for Major Trauma
Jordan* was a 24-year-old who had never experienced what he thought of as "real" trauma. No accidents, no violence, nothing dramatic. But he had grown up with a critical parent, and the way that criticism had lodged itself in his nervous system showed up everywhere: he procrastinated on projects because starting felt terrifying, he replayed conversations for days after they happened, and he couldn't take feedback at work without shutting down for the rest of the day.
He was skeptical that EMDR was "for him." EMDR was for people with PTSD, right?
His therapist explained that EMDR trauma therapy works on any experience the nervous system stored as threatening, including years of relational stress, chronic criticism, and attachment injuries that never made the news but shaped everything.
Six months in, Jordan noticed something he hadn't expected. He got critical feedback from his manager and felt annoyed, thought about it briefly, and moved on. That was new.
*Name and identifying details changed.
Things People Ask Before Starting EMDR
Do I have to talk about my trauma in detail?
Nope. This is one of the things people are most relieved to hear. EMDR doesn't require you to narrate your trauma in detail to your therapist. You can if you want, but you can be vague if that’s easier. You work with images, sensations, emotions, and body responses. You don't have to find the perfect words for what happened. The processing happens at a level below language.
What if I don't have clear memories?
EMDR can still work. A lot of trauma is stored as sensory fragments, body sensations, images, or emotional states rather than clear narrative memories. Your EMDR therapist is trained to work with whatever form the material takes, including fuzzy or implicit memory.
Can it work online?
Yes. Online EMDR therapy has solid research support. The bilateral stimulation methods adapt well to telehealth, and many clients actually prefer the comfort of doing this work from their own space. Our whole practice is online, and EMDR is one of the most common things we do.
Is it good for teens?
Yes. EMDR for teens is well-supported and often works particularly well because adolescent brains are still in an active stage of development, which can make trauma processing more responsive. Our therapists work with teens throughout California and Florida.
Will it make me feel worse before I feel better?
Sometimes, yes. Accessing and processing trauma can stir things up before they clear. Our post on why EMDR can feel harder before it gets easier explains what that looks like and how to know when it's normal versus when to flag it with your therapist.
The Eye Movements Are Weird. The Results Are Not.
EMDR therapy is, objectively, an odd-looking process. There's no getting around that.
But "odd-looking" and "effective" are not mutually exclusive. The evidence for EMDR is strong, the theory behind it is increasingly well-understood, and for a lot of people, it moves things that years of insight and good intentions couldn't shift.
If you're curious about trying it, the best starting point is a conversation with an EMDR therapist who can explain the process, answer your specific questions, and help you figure out whether it's a good fit.
You don't have to be sold on the eye movements to give it a try. Honestly, you might end up tapping your knees anyway.
EMDR Therapy in San Francisco, Los Angeles, Santa Cruz, and Online Throughout California and Florida
At Laurel Therapy Collective, EMDR trauma therapy is one of our core specialties. Our therapists work with adults and teens navigating trauma, anxiety, and the effects of experiences that never fully resolved.
We offer EMDR therapy online throughout California and Florida, with particular depth in San Francisco, Los Angeles, and Santa Cruz. If you're curious about whether EMDR might be right for you, we'd love to talk.
► Schedule a free consultation
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FAQs: EMDR Therapy Basics
What does EMDR therapy actually do?
EMDR therapy helps your brain reprocess traumatic memories that got stored in a fragmented, unfinished way. Using bilateral stimulation (back-and-forth sensory input like eye movements or tapping), EMDR activates a mechanism similar to what happens during REM sleep, allowing the brain to process and integrate experiences that previously stayed stuck. The result is that old memories lose their emotional charge; they become something that happened, rather than something that's still happening in your nervous system.
Do you have to use eye movements in EMDR?
No. Eye movements are the most studied form of bilateral stimulation, but EMDR therapy can be done with alternating auditory tones, hand or knee tapping, handheld vibrating buzzers, or light bars. Many EMDR therapists use a mix depending on what feels most comfortable for each client. In online EMDR sessions, tapping and audio are the most common alternatives, and both work well.
Is EMDR only for PTSD?
EMDR was originally developed to treat PTSD and the research there is particularly strong. But EMDR trauma therapy is also effective for anxiety, phobias, grief, attachment wounds, relational trauma, and a range of other issues. You don't need a PTSD diagnosis to benefit from it. If your nervous system stored an experience as threatening, EMDR may be able to help. See our post on what else EMDR can be used for for more.
How long does EMDR therapy take?
It varies significantly depending on how complex the trauma is, how much preparation work is needed, and how your nervous system responds to processing. For a single, relatively contained traumatic event, some people see meaningful shift in fewer sessions once active reprocessing begins. For complex or longstanding trauma, it takes longer. Most people working on significant trauma should expect a minimum of 8 sessions before having a clear sense of progress. Our post on how long EMDR takes to work has more detail on realistic timelines.
What does bilateral stimulation feel like during EMDR?
Most people describe it as repetitive and a little hypnotic, but not overwhelming. During eye movement sets, you follow a moving target with your eyes while holding a memory in mind. With tapping, you feel alternating pressure on your hands or knees.
Many clients say it creates a kind of dual awareness: you're aware of the memory and simultaneously aware of the present moment. That dual awareness is actually part of what makes processing possible. It keeps you connected to the memory without being flooded by it.
